Impermanence, Equanimity, Acceptance

We are called to realize that nothing lasts forever; neither what is good, nor what is bad. Everything is temporary, and transformation is taking place all the time.

humanity-reaching-out-to-divinity

We are called to realize that since everything is impermanent, all kinds of attachments lead to suffering.  So, we must be prepared to let go of everyone and everything. We are called to accept both what we consider to be good as well as what we consider to be bad with equanimity.

While taking good care of our health, we must be ready to accept the inevitable debilitating effects of aging. We must prepare ourselves to accept that we, our loved ones, and everyone else, will eventually get ill and die, and although we are taught to love, we must learn and be prepared to let go of all that we love.

Paraphrasing the Buddha, “Nothing is worth clinging to as I, me, or mine.”

We have to come to the realization that all our suffering comes from the idea of “I.” We have to let go of the stories and characters that we have created for ourselves, transcend our identification with our physical bodies, and realize that they are mere vessels of an Imperishable Light that is birthless and deathless.

We have to come to the realization that our suffering comes from forgetting that we are, at the same time, many and one, separated and united, independent and interdependent, mortal and immortal, human and divine.

><><><><


 

Let’s stay in touch.

Meetup – http://www.meetup.com/PeacefulWays/events/

Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/peacefulways

><><><><

Take a look at my books at the Peaceful Ways online store

http://peacefulways.org/store/

Book Cover Image

– “Peaceful Ways – The Power of Making Your Wishes Come True”

Pay Attention Book Cover

– “Pay Attention! Be Alert! Discovering Your Route to Happiness”

Silent_Peace_Walk_Cover_for_Kindle

– “Silent Peace Walk”

www.PieroFalci.com

www.SilentPeaceWalk.org

www.peacefulways.org

www.DAPAdiversity.com


 

 

 

 

The Habitual Visitors

“Hi! There you are again, my recurring thoughts, my little, agitated monkey friends!

Wow! What a surprise! I didn’t notice you were here. I just saw you.

Before we go any further, let me congratulate myself for having noticed you. This makes me very happy! Yeepee!

May I ask you how long have you been here with me? Quite some time, I imagine, right?

Well, unfortunately I can’t give my attention to you right now. We will have to get together some other time. I am sorry but I have to ask you to leave. I need to get back to my breath.

Anyway, it was good seeing you again. Thank you for stopping by.

Bye!”

~ Piero Falci

piero-meditando-1

The unrestrained, unruly, and chaotic thoughts are habitual visitors. We must gently ask them to leave, so we can stay alone, for a while, in that calm space between thoughts. By doing so, later on, when higher quality thoughts knock on our door, we will be ready to welcome and entertain them.


 

><><><><

Let’s stay in touch.

Meetup – http://www.meetup.com/PeacefulWays/events/

Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/peacefulways

><><><><

Take a look at my books at the Peaceful Ways online store

http://peacefulways.org/store/

Book Cover Image

– “Peaceful Ways – The Power of Making Your Wishes Come True”

Pay Attention Book Cover

– “Pay Attention! Be Alert! Discovering Your Route to Happiness”

Silent_Peace_Walk_Cover_for_Kindle

– “Silent Peace Walk”

www.PieroFalci.com

www.SilentPeaceWalk.org

www.peacefulways.org

www.DAPAdiversity.com


 

Unaware of the Imperishable Light

If you are familiar with “The Four Agreements” (a popular book by Don Miguel Ruiz) you will remember, “Don’t take anything personally.”

the-four-agreements

I am called to remember that even though I have been conditioned to think in terms of “I,” the truth is that nothing is about me. As much as I am conditioned to think this way, I am not the center of the Universe, and therefore I should not give myself too much importance, or take anything personally because there is no “I.” The same is true for you: it’s not about you. You are not the center of the Universe, so don’t give yourself too much importance, and don’t take anything personally because there is no “You.”

><><><><

“Certainly there are a distinct “me” and a distinct “you” operating in our everyday relationships with the world. Each of us comes as a unique package of qualities and conditions shaped by myriad factors. We call this “my self.” Yet, when we look closely into our lives, we see that we are made up of thousands of what the Vietnamese Zen master Thich Nhat Hanh calls “non-self” elements, such things as earth, water, fire, air, space, carbon, oxygen, parents, genes from the entire planet pool. The same constituents that make up the sun, the stars in the night sky, and the salty seas are part of our common, embodied heritage… it is easy to forget all this.” ~ Saki Santorelli, Heal Thy Self

><><><><

“Nothing whatsoever is to be clung to as I, me, or mine.” ~ Buddha

When the Buddha was asked, “In brief, how is a monk liberated from the destruction of craving?” he replied, “A monk who has understood that nothing is worth clinging to as me, I, or mine, directly knows all things.”

><><><><

But why do we give ourselves so much importance?

We came to explain this sense of separation that we experience through this thing that we call “Ego.” The ego makes us believe that we are separated from and in competition with others. According to the Buddha, we will all experience the following eight worldly vicissitudes throughout lives: Gain and loss / Praise and blame / Pleasure and pain / Fame and disrepute. Trying to cling to gain, praise, pleasure, and fame, while thinking that we can shield ourselves from experiencing loss, blame, pain, and disrepute is illogical and impossible. Well, the ego craves praise and recognition. It wants to win, feel superior, feel that it is better than others. Well, the ego is not a good adviser. Listening to the ego and its demands is a sure source of suffering, because the ego leads us to do unwise things. The ego is the one who takes things personally, gets offended, and feels the need to retaliate. The ego is the one who believes that the way to get rid of our pain is to seek revenge and inflict pain in someone else. The ego mistakenly believes that if we would wipe out our enemies (as if that would be possible!) everything would be fine. The ego wrongly believes that violent means can bring about the peace we so desperately seek.

We’d better not listen to the ego. We’d better not take anything personally. We’d better not cling to anything as I, me, or mine, because we are more than these mortal physical beings that the ego makes us believe we are. We are manifestations of an energy that is ever present  and immortal.

Take a moment to reflect on this passage:

There is a Light that lights every man that comes into the world. That Light is Eternal, All-Powerful and Imperishable. Only that which is subject to birth is subject to death. The Light is the extension of God into man. It is not born nor can it die. ~ Douglas K. DeVorss , in Eulogy for Baird T. Spalding,  in The Life and Teachings of the Masters of the Far East, Volume 6.

Under the rule of our egos, we grew unaware of this Imperishable Light that lives in all of us. We have forgotten our original nature. We have forgotten that every child comes into the world with this light, full of love, gentleness and kindness. We have forgotten our  pure essence. We have forgotten who we are and why we are here.

Under the rule of our egos, we have made of this planet a place of widespread insanity. Why do we feel this compulsion to compete and defeat others all the time? Why do we oppress, exploit, enslave, take advantage of, torture, and kill other beings? Why are we so violent? Why?

Let us remember who we are and why we are here. We are here to learn, and the most important lesson we all need to learn is to tame our egos. We are here to learn to diminish our selfishness and expand our selflessness. We are here to develop our modesty and contain our arrogance. We are here to learn to grow in compassion and service to others.

Now, let us pause and see what is really happening. Even though things may look bleak the truth is that for every selfish and harmful act there are millions of selfless acts of kindness. There’s a lot more good than bad in the world, and we are perfectly equipped and capable of diminishing what is bad. How? By doing even more good. So let us love, care, and share. Let us focus on the abundant good that exists in our world. Let us realize that Heaven is here, if we want it to be.

><><><><

“He who has realized that nothing is worth clinging to as I, me, or mine, knows all things.” ~ The Buddha

><><><><

‘The Buddha once said that the core message of all his teachings could be summed up in one sentence. … That sentence is: ‘Nothing is to be clung to as I, me, or mine.’ In other words, no attachments—especially to fixed ideas of yourself and who you are.’ ~ Jon Kabat-Zinn, Arriving at Your Own Door: 108 Lessons in Mindfulness

><><><><


 

><><><><

Stay in touch.

Meetup – http://www.meetup.com/PeacefulWays/events/

Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/peacefulways

><><><><

Take a look at these books at the Peaceful Ways online store

http://peacefulways.org/store/

Book Cover Image

– “Peaceful Ways – The Power of Making Your Wishes Come True”

Pay Attention Book Cover

– “Pay Attention! Be Alert! Discovering Your Route to Happiness”

Silent_Peace_Walk_Cover_for_Kindle

– “Silent Peace Walk”

www.PieroFalci.com

www.SilentPeaceWalk.org

www.PeacefulWays.org

www.DAPAdiversity.com


 

><><><><

Piero Falci loves to observe, reflect, and write. He is an explorer of the mysteries of life who not only strives to live a life that matters, but who also hopes to inspire others to do the same. He is an author and educator who believes that the inner work that leads to personal awakening is indispensable to create a wholesome world. He is a promoter of peace who believes in advancing the idea that Heaven is here, if we want it to be. He teaches mindfulness meditation and mindful living, and organizes Silent Peace Walks.

I Am Responsible For My Reality

I create the life that I desire. I create the world in which I want to live. I create my reality. In fact, I don’t create it; it already exists. I just need to develop my ability to see it. The moment I see it, I realize that it has always been here, and I can live it. I am responsible for my reality.

i-create-my-own-reality

The best thing I can do to live the life I want to live is to raise my consciousness and see that this reality that I desire is actually available to me right here, right now.

The best contribution I can give to bring about a better world is to raise my consciousness and see the world I desire right here, right now.

My best contribution to elevate the collective consciousness is given by elevating my own consciousness. I am responsible for my reality.

The change I want — in my life and in the world — begins with me. I am responsible for my reality.

i-create-my-own-reality-2

><><><><

Let’s stay in touch.

Meetup – http://www.meetup.com/PeacefulWays/events/

Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/peacefulways

><><><><

Take a look at my books at the Peaceful Ways online store

http://peacefulways.org/store/

Book Cover Image

– “Peaceful Ways – The Power of Making Your Wishes Come True”

Pay Attention Book Cover

– “Pay Attention! Be Alert! Discovering Your Route to Happiness”

Silent_Peace_Walk_Cover_for_Kindle

– “Silent Peace Walk”

www.PieroFalci.com

www.SilentPeaceWalk.org

www.peacefulways.org

www.DAPAdiversity.com


 

The Sunrise Paddleboarder

From two years ago…

///

Well, here I am, the Sunrise Paddleboarder, savoring the beauty of this garden and having fun in this playground…

I am blessed and so are you…

Imagine if everyone received this message upon arrival on this planet, how much better things would be… “Congratulations! You’ve made it! You’re in the best place in the Universe. This is your Garden and your Playground, created for your enjoyment. Now, go have fun, make friends, share your toys, and, if you can, make the garden and the playground more beautiful and enjoyable for everyone. And, by the way, don’t worry about anything. Be not afraid. This is a place of abundance. There’s more than enough here for everybody to have a good life. Just share. You will be OK.”

— this picture was taken at the Deerfield Beach Pier, on October 19, 2014. Thanks to my friend Rick Alovis, the photographer.

The Sunrise Paddleboarder

><><><><

Let’s stay in touch.

Meetup – http://www.meetup.com/PeacefulWays/events/

Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/peacefulways

><><><><

Take a look at my books at the Peaceful Ways online store

http://peacefulways.org/store/

Book Cover Image

– “Peaceful Ways – The Power of Making Your Wishes Come True”

Pay Attention Book Cover

– “Pay Attention! Be Alert! Discovering Your Route to Happiness”

Silent_Peace_Walk_Cover_for_Kindle

– “Silent Peace Walk”

www.PieroFalci.com

www.SilentPeaceWalk.org

www.peacefulways.org

www.DAPAdiversity.com


 

 

Develop your Strengths

Yes, I can do a lot, but I cannot do everything I would like to do. I have my limitations. For instance — and I know this may sound childish — I would like to have a more flexible body, with a greater range of motion, so I could be able to do those yoga postures restfully, without striving.  Mindfulness reminds me, “Here you are again, with your desires, with your cravings and aversions, with wanting this and not wanting that. Stop. Practice equanimity. Simply accept what is.”

Everyone is different. Each one of us is a different bundle of aggregated talents, attributes, skills, potentials and limitations.

I learned a great lesson from Tom Rath in his book “Strengths Finder 2.0.”  He referred to it as “a misguided maxim.” He said that one of the most damaging things we can tell our children is, “You can be anything you want to be, if you just try hard enough.”

The reality is that not everyone can be a Michael Jordan, or a Muhammad Ali, or a Pele, or a Michael Phelps, or an Einstein. A much more honest and less damaging advice is, “You cannot be anything you want to be — but you can be a lot more of who you already are. You can develop your innate talents, and excel in what you already are good at.”

We help our children succeed when our main focus is not on developing their weaknesses, but on maximizing their strengths.

Our fault is that we keep trying to develop weaknesses. We invest a lot of time in developing what we — or our children, teammates, co-workers, etc. — are not good at, and not so much in what we enjoy doing and already are good at. We hear a lot people saying things such as, “You’re failing in algebra. You need some extra classes.” We rarely, if ever, hear someone saying, “You write so well, express yourself so precisely, and have such a rich vocabulary. I will hire a tutor to further enhance your writing and speaking proficiency.”

It is evident that we need to give attention to both weaknesses and strengths, but wouldn’t it make more sense to invest more time, resources, and energy to develop further what we already are good at?

Wouldn’t it make more sense to develop our strengths?

youshoulddo1

><><><><

Let’s stay in touch.

Meetup – http://www.meetup.com/PeacefulWays/events/

Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/peacefulways

><><><><

Take a look at my books at the Peaceful Ways online store

http://peacefulways.org/store/

Book Cover Image

– “Peaceful Ways – The Power of Making Your Wishes Come True”

Pay Attention Book Cover

– “Pay Attention! Be Alert! Discovering Your Route to Happiness”

Silent_Peace_Walk_Cover_for_Kindle

– “Silent Peace Walk”

www.PieroFalci.com

www.SilentPeaceWalk.org

www.peacefulways.org

www.DAPAdiversity.com


 

 

 

Love Wastefully

Yesterday I was practicing mindfulness with a group of fellow meditators. At a certain point during the session, the facilitator began to guide us on a compassion / loving-kindness meditation (also known as metta), a very simple practice of mentally directing well-wishes and expressions of love towards your own self and others.

Well, during the meditation the instructor directed us to look back at our lives and remember occasions when we felt abundantly loved. She said, “Go back in time. Remember how loved you were when you were a child.”

To my amazement, I couldn’t easily remember occasions when I received lots of love. I looked back at my life and I could not clearly remember being immersed in a sea of affection, being hugged, caressed, kissed, praised, and loved. Actually, I can’t remember my parents showering me with an outpouring of affection. I am sure those moments existed. I am sure not only my parents, but also my relatives and friends bestowed affection in great quantities, but although I am sure those moments existed, honestly, I can’t clearly remember them. I also can’t remember being copiously and munificently loved by any of the women in my life. Actually, I can’t remember anyone being wastefully generous in giving me love, or doing things that made me feel unconditionally loved, with maybe one exception: I have a vague memory of my maternal grandmother holding me in her arms when I was a little child, dancing around, smiling, kissing me, and letting me know how much she loved me, and how happy she was to have me in her life.

Well, all those insights were surprising and shocking, and I began to ask myself: “Why can’t I remember receiving love? Have I blocked those memories? If so, why?”

But I also have learned that for many people, showing love is not an easy thing. I, then, asked myself, “Why so many people refrain from showing affection? Could it be because they have not learned how to do it, or have not experienced it themselves? Could this be the case with my parents? Or could it be that they didn’t show affection because they were taught that showing it is a sign of weakness?”

Immediately, other questions came to my mind: “Why do people measure and ration the love they give? Why do some people think that a person who receives love will become dependent and demanding and therefore, in order to avoid such a situation, love should be given parsimoniously? Why don’t people love wastefully?”

I began to raise doubts about the existence of unconditional love: “Does unconditional love really exist? Or is all love conditional? ” And it became more personal when I started to investigate my own motivation, “Do I crave to be loved? Do I crave to be the recipient of affection? What does this tell me?” 

Finally, bigger and more important questions emerged: “Am I able to be satisfied with all the love I have received throughout my life, and the love I still receive, without wanting more? Can I calmly accept my past and present life situation without longing for it to be different?”

Well, one of the requirements of the mindfulness journey I am in is to be aware of my cravings and aversions and practice equanimity. Yesterday’s metta meditation brought to the surface some buried feelings. I felt deprived. I felt a craving for a kind of love and affection that I don’t remember receiving. I saw myself as a needy being, a type of person that I don’t want to be because I believe that such an unbalanced individual is not a magnet for love. On the contrary, I believe that those who are more easily loved are the ones who feel whole and complete. Those who are loved are the ones who are able to freely give lots of love, not the ones who desperately desire to receive it.

After a more calm, lengthy, and thorough reflection I realized that things have changed and are different these days. I sincerely feel generously loved these days by my father, my sister, my aunt, by all my relatives, especially by my sons, who, by the way, are the ones who receive, more than any other people in my life, my expressions of love. I constantly remind them of how much they mean to me and how much I love them. I realized that I have changed. With the passing of time, I became a less self-centered individual, and, therefore, better able to give love and affection.

What comes to my mind is a line in the Prayer of Saint Francis that reads, “It is in giving that we receive.” So, from now on, I will make sure that I become more generous in my love-giving. I will give love and affection freely, abundantly, profusely, wastefully. And I will also make sure that I will remain wide open to receive in the same dosage I give. From now on, I will give myself the love I don’t remember receiving, and I will remind myself that I am loved. From now on, I will let everybody know that they are loved.

Know that you are loved.

Receive my love.

><><><><

Love wastefully

Give love generously, and continue to give, even if some go to waste.


 

><><><><

Let’s stay in touch.

Meetup – http://www.meetup.com/PeacefulWays/events/

Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/peacefulways

><><><><

Take a look at my books at the Peaceful Ways online store

http://peacefulways.org/store/

Book Cover Image

– “Peaceful Ways – The Power of Making Your Wishes Come True”

Pay Attention Book Cover

– “Pay Attention! Be Alert! Discovering Your Route to Happiness”

Silent_Peace_Walk_Cover_for_Kindle

– “Silent Peace Walk”

www.PieroFalci.com

www.SilentPeaceWalk.org

www.peacefulways.org

www.DAPAdiversity.com


 

A Dialogue of Self and Soul

I am content to follow to its source
Every event in action or in thought;
Measure the lot; forgive myself the lot!
When such as I cast out remorse
So great a sweetness flows into the breast
We must laugh and we must sing,
We are blest by everything,
Everything we look upon is blest.

~ WILLIAM BUTLER YEATS

W. B. Yeats, “A Dialogue of Self and Soul” from The Poems of W. B. Yeats: A New Edition, edited by Richard J. Finneran. Copyright 1933 by Macmillan Publishing Company, renewed © 1961 by Georgie Yeats. Reprinted with the permission of A. P. Watt, Ltd. on behalf of Michael Yeats.
Source: The Collected Works of W. B. Yeats (1989)

><><><><><

Let’s stay in touch.

Meetup – http://www.meetup.com/PeacefulWays/events/

Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/peacefulways

><><><><

Take a look at my books at the Peaceful Ways online store

http://peacefulways.org/store/

Book Cover Image

– “Peaceful Ways – The Power of Making Your Wishes Come True”

Pay Attention Book Cover

– “Pay Attention! Be Alert! Discovering Your Route to Happiness”

Silent_Peace_Walk_Cover_for_Kindle

– “Silent Peace Walk”

www.PieroFalci.com

www.SilentPeaceWalk.org

www.peacefulways.org

www.DAPAdiversity.com